I Won't Say I'm in Love
by Lilybelmae
Summary: Lily Evans has been thinking about a certain someone with bright hazel eyes, messy black hair and who is Head Boy. Can you guess who she's thinking about? Join Lily as she realizes that she is undeniably, irrevocably in love with the one person she never thought she'd ever fall in love with. Warning: There is a small bit of swearing.
**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters, places and events of Harry Potter. The amazing JK Rowling does. Copyright 1998 Bloomsbury Publishing.**

Lily Evans sighed as she shifted the weight of her messenger bag as she walked down to the Great Hall from Transfiguration. She had been thinking a lot about a certain someone lately and it was driving her mental. He had just wormed his way into her thoughts and wouldn't leave much to Lily's displeasure. Who was this certain someone? That someone was none other than Lily's frenemy since first year, James Potter. And right now, worse than ever before, Lily was thinking about Potter. Perhaps it was because they had just had transfiguration together and she had mastered the day's lesson faster than Potter for a change. Or perhaps it was because Potter was Head Boy just as Lily was Head Girl and they had been doing rounds and leading the prefects together. How Potter had become Head Boy, Lily didn't know. He hadn't been a prefect, although his friend Remus Lupin had been. Potter had however been Quidditch Captain and as much as Lily loathed admitting it he had matured in the past year and a half. Or perhaps and Lily didn't want to admit this to herself, she was in love with Potter. Perhaps he had driven Lily head over heels although she was too stubborn to admit it. Of course, Lily thought, it couldn't have been love. After, all Potter had been an arrogant toerag since day one. He tortured the Slytherins especially her ex-friend Severus Snape and pranked and hexed unsuspecting students for fun.

Yet, Lily thought, he's changed so much this past year! He doesn't pick on Snape as much anymore and he no longer hexes unsuspecting students. Oh shut up! Lily thought to herself angrily, just because he doesn't hex people anymore doesn't mean he no longer pulls pranks. And he does still hex Snape when he thinks you don't notice! Although, Lily admitted to herself, those pranks are sort of funny and Severus does deserve it sometimes. Oh what I am saying! Do NOT encourage him, Evans! Lily thought angrily to herself. Yet, as much as Lily hated to admit it and oh did she despise admitting it, James did take his duties as Head Boy very seriously. He had taken 10 points from Gryffindor just the other day when he caught Sirius conspiring with Peeves to lock Mrs. Norris in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. He also made Head duties much more interesting for even Lily had to confess that walking around the castle looking for students out of bed could get quite dull to anyone who wasn't Filch or Mrs. Norris. Lily loved the stories James would tell her of his escapades with the Marauders though she'd never tell him that. She loved to hear him tell her about the passageways he found with his friends and even about the pranks they pulled although she didn't want to encourage him to prank others. Most of all, Lily had loved the night that they had stopped by the astronomy tower and stargazed for a little while before returning to Gryffindor tower. It had been nice, she admitted, to spend time with Potter without bickering with him. And, she had to confess, he was a much better person than she gave him credit for. It seemed his ego got in the way when they were around the rest of the Marauders, especially Sirius Black, but when it was just the two of them James could be really sweet.

However, Lily reminded herself, there was still the fact that Potter still pestered her constantly with requests to go out with him. Well, she conceded, not as often as he used to and that's probably because I've been too proud to give in. What am I saying? Lily thought horrified, I don't want to give in do I? Oh but those requests are pretty cute like the first time he asked me out in fourth year and got all flustered. It shows that he does care about me and must really like me a whole lot to keep pursuing me. Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Lily thought furiously, I do NOT want Potter pursuing me romantically! For one thing is a massive braggart, I mean he just can't shut up when it comes to his latest accomplishments. But, I've really only seen him brag when I'm around. I bet he's just trying to impress me enough to…shut up now Lily Evans, you're treading down a dangerous path! After all this is Potter we're talking about here, Evans. He's a massive show off and loves every opportunity to flaunt himself to the rest of the school. Oh come on Lily! She admonished herself, he only does that when you're around and I know you know why. Because he bloody loves you and you love him back. Arrgh! I am _**NOT**_ in love with Potter! Just because he is an excellent Quidditch player who handles the quaffle brilliantly and wins just about every game despite boasting about it so much and just because he fancies me does _**not**_ mean I fancy him! Although, Lily thought dreamily, he is really handsome, so toned and muscular and his big, bright hazel eyes are gorgeous especially when he winks at me. And that messy black hair that he tousles all the time… stupid sexy Potter! Curse your stupid good looks for making me fall head over heels for you! Lily Joanne Evans, Lily gently scolded herself, you know that Potter's immaculate looks have nothing to do with you being crazy for him. Alright! Alright! Alright! Lily practically shouted in her mind as she entered the Great Hall, you win ok? And as Lily hefted her bag to the floor and took a seat next to James, she thought, I love James Potter, with every fibre of my being. But, Lily grinned mischievously, at least out loud, I won't say I'm in love.


End file.
